Saturday, February 27, 2010

The Least Of These

What makes doing a Goth/Industrial nightclub worth it? There are other jobs that I could be doing that would be more financially rewarding. I have the skill to draw and paint, create things with my hands like sculpture, jewelry and other works. I am a great and prolific writer. I am a classically trained singer and have the knack for songwriting, and not only that, I make a good model and dancer. Why THIS?

It's certainly not for the accolades, which are few and far between. The better a job I do, the more I am envied and despised by my peers who act increasingly hostile as the months go by. I'm disturbing the dubious status quo by reestablishing a weekly schedule as the norm for club nights, and I'm sure it's interrupting some people's plans, forcing them to work harder and increasing resentment. No, this is not someone's pet project- this is the Manhattan Goth/Industrial Scene, which will go on despite assertions that "the scene is dying"(yeah, right, that's why you're all out there still doing it. If it's dying, then YOU leave.)

Honestly, the reason I do it is because at the end of a long, grueling night fighting a snowstorm to get people into the club and all sorts of other hardships, a girl turned to me and said "As long as you do this night, I will be here". It's the commitment to THAT girl- the one who enjoys coming because, for ONCE, she is in an environment of possibility, creativity and acceptance, if only for a few hours, where dreams really can come alive. That's the reason why I used to go. And that's why I'm not going to let her down, at least not if I can help it.